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this blog is about my life through my eyes
any feelings hurt or spirt crushed will not be
not be held against the mangement of this blog(meaning me)
if you wish you voice out any unhappiness due to the blog
or otherwise look out for my tagboard where you can voice
your opinion about the blog and/or it's contents
any personal unsatisfactions about me will be taken up
in my presence to my face
entries in this blog are how i feel at that moment in time
and not my everyday presence of mind
feelings and opinions change so do not hold me accountable
for any kind of misinterpretation of the blog

something is wrong...i can feel it in my bones right down to my toes...somethin is very very wrong...really truly utterly wrong....e last time i felt like tis somethin did go wrong...horribly wrong...horribly wrong....so utterly wrong tat i dont want to really relive it...somethin is goin to happen n it is nt goin to b good...i dont noe wat...but it is not good for me...furthermore apart from tis..i hv been feelin frustrated n snappy...it is not the stress kind of frustration but oh...i dont noe...i juz feel like i hv all tis expandable energy..n i hv no idea wat to wif it...i m nt e one for runnin...i juz dont like it...but i did go dancinn..n by dancin i me my brathanatyam classes...n i felt like a ton better after tat...like some of tat energy has ben relieved.....WTF IS WRONG WITH ME!!!...i hv no blinkin clue!!!.....i m sulkin n pouting...broodin....written emo poems...about totally unrelated issues....i juz feel like bangin my head somewher....ARRRGH!!!!...n all i feel like doin is shoppin...n all i eva buy i sexy tops tat i cant wear anywher....or rather hv no reason to wear!!...AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!....i think i better go before i blab somemore....

WHAT I SEE

wen i am alone.
i see ur face.
can u feel my pain
as i forget the race.
wen i look beyond you
i see him n i cant decide.
the choice tat is nonexistant.
the fate that does not agree
is the one tat i wish.
will someday happen to me.
tis miracle being you.

so will you come to me.
my love
cos i hv waitin so long
i fear i might forget
how it is like to feel your love
surround me
engulfing n fillin me
makin me feel more alive
then i hv been by far

but i forget
that tis love will not be
fate has decided against us
pushin us apart
i try to hold on
but u let go of me

a dream
yes it was all a dream
the love tat i prayed for
the joy i seeked
all imagined
in my head
so i see u again
my heart breakin
wif words i cant say
wat's the point
u dont love me

tat much u decided

written by:loshana(9:33pm 21/10/07)

read in between the lines if u must but i wld like to say...i dont need to explain myself...

it's been quite some time since my scribbling has been pasted onto this space wei...too much time has like gone by...but nevertheless i shld say that everythin is stil e same old same old...yup nothin has happened tat is significant enough to really talk bout but wateva lah....ther as usual has been some drama....n for one thing i really admire divs for the fact tat she has guts way...she really does...i mean she can stand up for herself n tat is somethin tat i always feel tat i can neva do....guess i m juz some kind of door mat...sighs wei really sighs....anyways other then tat lets see i have played poker...realised tat i m not completely allergic to um...wateva....n well i also get to well...um...whicheva....haha...guess somethins r juz meant to b kept to ourselves...haha...um other then tat...oh rite every person i noe i s like jaded...yup u heard me rite...J-A-D-E-D....jaded...so while i keep on hopin tat somethin will happen...every1 else juz wishes tat they keep their "singleness"...sighs u noe!!...tis negetive energy may b wat is keepin me from actually finding anythin or anyone...so like i m really not happy bout tat....but wat to do...anyways i think i will go n sulk somewher else....cos well all i feel like doin is sulkin n well sulkin shld b done elsewher....*sulk*......