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Friday, September 30, 2005
well i hv some of my results back....so of them r gd some bad some nowhere exactli....but i am not gonna talk bout tat yet until i hv gotten my english n ss results back...i juz feel totalli demoralized 2dai...well i juz found out tat 1 of e smarty pants likes 1 of my bez frends...well who or wat is irregardless...
i mean he is okay lah i supp...but my frend juz happens 2 b 1 of e prettiest gals in sch...
i mean besides being thin n havin a realitively clear complexion....she is so bloody pretty..
it makes me look bad...i mean seriousli look at her...he is nt e 1st guy 2 say it...n probabli nt e last...
she is great person 2..which makees it worse...
i mean i noe i am nt exactli gd-lookin...okay..so-so....a bit below average.....
but wat's e problem wif tat.. i am definetly obseneli ugly or anythin....
but i am like totalli ignored...every guy i pass by wen i am wif her..looks at her n ...
completeli ignores my existence....it happens in sch..outside...everywhere...
it muz b cos she is thin....yes tat is e onli explainatn...
i used 2 b super fat nw i am juz fat..but it does nt matter i am still FAT...
is it wrong 2 feel tat i wld like juz a little male attentn besides tat of my family...
all e boys in sch hate me...i noe tat 4 a fact..i don give a rat's ass about them expt 1 person...
he walks by like i am nt there he avoids any for of contact as in we neva talk..expt mayb twice in 4 yrs...
we take e same bus but well he doesnt care cos all e other guys in sch dont tink tat i am "babe" material...
i mean he did go out wif a bitch..wen he wen 4 looks...then wat's wrong wif my character...
am i snobby..i don think so....i don think i am better than every1 else rather e opp...
i think ever1 esle is better then mi...so y!!..i noe cos i am nt pretty enogh....
yup tat is like e onli exlpainatn....i mean wat is wrong wif tis world...
some times i juz wish i knew wat he thinks of me...wen he is not around his frends...
but i noe tat it will b nothin much....sick ok tis world is juz so fuckin sick....
n 2 e poor sucker who fell 4 my frend...it is nt ur fault but 2 bad...
juz suck it n go 2 RJC or where ever...she is nt interested...of n by e way u r 3 yrs 2 late....